Lady in Waiting

So as much as I don't want to admit it I am fairly certain that we will be going to 39 Weeks.  After this week's tests and blood pressure check I am fairly certain that I am not preeclamptic this time around.  Which is a good thing.  It actually gives us hope for the next pregnancy which we were unsure about.  I think a lot of what has happened with my blood pressure this pregnancy has been "worry" induced because of what happened with my first pregnancy (emergency c-section at 35 weeks due to severe preeclampsia).  That being said I am encouraged that with me not having it this pregnancy that our chances will be even less in the next pregnancy.  Because I wasn't ready to say this is it for us.  I'd like to at least try for a boy next.  Now we may wait longer than having them 2 years apart.  Like maybe waiting til Charlee is out of diapers before we have another one.  That would make things easier if I am to be put on bed rest again for any reason.
So I am operating on the assumption that I have 2 more weeks of bed rest until little Charlee's arrival.  Some things that make me sad about this are that now I won't be having another little baby like Lily was.  But at least she will be healthy and full term.  We won't be able to participate in Life Spring's child dedication service Sunday May 23rd with my friends who had babies this past year.  I've had to miss out on family gatherings and will be missing out on more in the next coming weeks.  My recovery is now going to get pushed back which might prevent me from doing some things that I could if we had her this week.  Like I won't be able to swim this summer until July now.  But those are all just reasons, not good excuses for wishing this pregnancy be over.  I want her to get as much time as she needs in there and now I know that's what God has planned for us at this point.  There's a reason my protein wasn't high enough.  There's a reason my blood pressure couldn't get high enough yesterday at the doctor.  God does not want Charlee to be born yet.  And now that I have accepted that I know that He's in control and whatever complications can still happen at this point I know that He is in charge and not me.  And now I actually have time to read the books for our Women's Ministry book club this summer.  I wasn't sure if I'd have time to read the first one with Charlee arriving this week but now with 2 more weeks of bed rest I should be able to.  Currently Reading: